My mum and I

My mum and I really can't communicate well. I wonder why she can't even stand at my side and try to give in....

My mum has a bad tempered. Normally she won't calm down and solve the problems together but she will shout and curse people instead. If the matters go serious and when she is really mad, she will go insane and throw stuffs.

Back to the old days, my parents like to quarrel. They can quarrel about anything. As long as that is what she wants, she will do it whatever. She doesn't care about anything or anyone. I am really pity of my dad. He can't even decide what he wants to do. In fact, he can't do anything. He can't go out with his friends; he can't go to the dinner even though the boss asked him to. He has no freedom and rights to do anything.

My mum never pay attention to my studies. Maybe she did when i was studying in kindergarten. I did really bad  in primary school. This might because there was no one who can guide me when i was lost. I went to Australia to visit my cousins when i was 12. I saw the differences between my life and theirs. Starting from that day, i decided to study really really hard so that i can have a brighter future instead.

I didn't study at a well-known high school. There was a lot of bad influences around me. Thanks to God cos He guide me and tell me what is good and bad. I chose to study hard and ignored other things. I remembered when i was having my PMR and SPM test, my mom told me "i don't think you can get a good result maybe 2 A's are enough for you." I was really angry and wondered why she didn't encourage me but irritate me. Luckily i worked hard and got what i want.

Same thing happens now. She doesn't know what's happening to me now. When other aunties or uncles asked about my studies and asked when will i start uni again, she was blurred. Sooo upset.
Her attitude makes me nuts especially when she is trying to use her temper to solve the problems. This is what makes me really wanna leave home. So i decided to go study away from home to escape from everything. She always told me i cant do anything without her but I DID! I can do everything by myself!!!

 She never skype with me last year. My dad was the only one who did. I never get a call from her also. That's actually pretty sad.

Today, i was texting with Sammy (cousin from Aussie). She asked me to visit her and suggested me to work there also since i still have four months of holiday. She could bring me to go around and we can even go shopping together!!! I went to ask my dad to see whether i could really go. I told him i gotta work and earn money and also spend my holiday there for several months. He said OKAY! but when the question came to my mum. Again. As what i have expected, i got scolded again. She asked me to stop daydreaming. Actually i asked her to let me go visit my friend in KL few weeks ago. Same thing happened to me :( I never ask for anything since i was a kid. Please let me decide my own things.

I just really hope that she can understand me more.

My First Ever Job

My first job is gonna be really memorable. Why? because there are so many things happen at one time.

The first day of working was terrible. I was still sick but have no choice, i had to start working. The boss wanted me to go the main brunch for training then only move to the new brunch which was going to open on the next day . So i spent the whole day packing and standing for 12 hours. The manager asked me to try memorizing the name and the price. I was scolded by her once when i hold the bread too hard causing the break to change shape Haha.. Luckily, i only stayed there for one day because other colleagues told me that the manager there is super fierce and has a strong mood swing.

The bakery has two managers. The guy manager was asked to work at the new brunch so he will be the one who guide me. He always brought along his friend, Samuel to the shop. He is still 17 but i thought he is older than me when the first time i saw him. Samuel is really weird. I can feel that there was always one pair of eye which keep looking at me whenever i was working. So annoying.

I learnt a lot of stuffs actually like packing, arranging the buns on the tray, promoting the cake and many more. It is tough for me because i am not really good at promoting but i have tried to improve if not the manager will call me and have a talk with me. So scary weih :(

The worst part of working is standing for 12 hours. My feet were really painful. I wonder why the boss so cruel. I have only have 2 break time, half an hour each. So i have to eat very fast when the food come. I felt damn sleepy and tired everyday. Sometimes i will just sleep while standing at the corner when there was no customer. The shop got 4 CCTVs some more. So we must be really careful cos the boss will check us on the CCTVs. Such a stressful job.

I worked there for about two weeks and now i quit. The manager called Dickson is 21. He has a girlfriend who studying at New Zealand. When there is no customer, they will start chatting. The topic will be racing, clubbing and relationships. I am really tired of that and i think they will definitely give me a bad influence. I told my parents and they wanted me to quit as the working hour is too long and also because of the people there.

Dickson is quite understanding. He will help me take the heavy tray and if it's raining, he will help me take instead. He never scold me but he will scold the other colleague and asked why they didn't check what did i do wrong. I was shocked actually. I thought he is just being understanding at first but that's not the end of the story. After one week of working, Dickson used to disturb me. He will catch my gaze, stand closer to me and the most disgusting part is he touches my hair. OMGGG. He even offered me a movie ticket but the movie is only playing at 11:30pm! meaning the movie can only end at 1am. My parents will kill me if i go with them. So i reject them.

Just on the last two days of working, Dickson and Samuel wanted to have lunch with me. So they just came to my table and sat in front of me. That's so annoying. So yea finally there's no more working. I thought we will just end like this but NO. He text me and said he got good feeling towards me. He will find me if he is single again and he will contact me when i reach KL.WTSS Other colleagues told me that also. So awkwarddd. I dont know how to reject him so i just pretend everything was just a lie on April fools. I text him and asked him to be back to normal cos today is not April Fools anymore. He seems hurt but i dont care! Such a hamsap and huaxin guy he is!

Going to meet him later to get my salary tonight. I think i will just act like nothing happen before and take my salary and say goodbye and never come back again :)